before I start my very first paragraph, I would like to thank everyone for the support you gave through every hell-bound challenge and not to forget my happiness parts, your endless support do gave me the strength to never give up in life. Not once, not twice nor thrice, I said that i'm done with my life, why am i still breathing, why do Allah swt gave me hard challenges throughout my lifetime, why do i always get the hardest part while everyone are happily enjoying their life without any fights and sorrow. Somehow it's so unfair to me, but let bygone be bygones, fate is fate, destiny is destiny, nothing can ever change past nor fate. For the record, I've go through an unstoppable sadness more than happiness which is very unfair if you're in my shoes. It's like im bombarded with sadness, it's like im drowned in a river which flows to sadness. I'm never truly happy, I have no glorious days to be remembered whenever i'm feeling sad. I'm exceedingly incomprehensible, no one will ever understand my situation. To be honest, what I really want in my life is to succeed, to find someone who truly understand me without any doubt, to know that someone actually care. But none of my so-called-wish came true, it saddens me when all of my friends think i'm always happy when deep down, i'm not.
No more heartbreaks, I need a rest, I need a vacation. I've lost my interest in everything, I hope you're doing well, hope you're not going through the same shit as mine. Lightheartedly, I never hope for more, I just want joy and happiness.No sarcasms nor dedications intended, I just need to express myself without using bad words, it's not easy and it's never easy. It's hard to deal with my daily situations, I guess i'm strong enough to face all of the upcoming challenges.
By insincerely being happy I guess?
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